The Polite One's Insights

  It may be difficult to believe, but not long ago, those hosting a dinner party , seated couples separately to encourage conversation.   For those of us who feel tethered—in a good way—to our significant other, this made for an uncomfortable evening.   Thankfully, this is no longer ‘the rule’.  Now the well-mannered host can seat couples next to each other and not fear a dull evening or a slap on the wrist from the etiquette police.  Who Are Your Guests? The great host always knows something about his/her guests and attempts to learn more, like food /beverage preferences and restrictions, and if the guest is talkative or shy.   This makes it much easier to seat them across from a couple that may complement them.   In fact, seating complementary guests across from one another helps liven a gathering.   Seeing others’ faces helps stimulate conversation greatly. Anyone Want to Know About Crowder Vs. Ling? It is best to also know abou...

  "How do I eat..." is one of the many common questions I received daily as an etiquette specialist.   Here are those questions with my answers.   How do I eat bread or rolls? Place butter on the rim of the bread plate if you have one, if not use your dinner plate.   Tear a small piece of bread or roll over your plate and butter the bread eating one piece at a time. When eating soup, what do I do with the spoon when I am not holding it? Place the spoon in the bowl or on the bowl liner if provided.   Never allow a utensil to touch the table once it is used. Which bread plate is mine? Yours is on the left above the forks. At a family -style meal, which way do I pass the food? All dishes are passed from the left to the right. During a business meal, when should I begin to discuss business? Usually, you begin to discuss business after the first course, or appetizer.   If the group is not having the first courses, wait until after everyon...

  In my decades as an etiquette specialist, I’ve received countless questions about table manners and how to eat certain food.   So I’ve included information about this subject in a number of my books.   What follows is one small portion of Dining Etiquette : Essential Guide for Table Manners, Business Meals, Sushi, Wine, and Tea Etiquette. Apples: Quarter apples with a fruit knife or steak knife; the core is cut away from each piece and pieces are eaten with the fingers.   If you choose to remove the skin, pare each piece separately. Artichoke: Eat artichokes with the fingers one leaf at a time.   Dip leaves into the sauce provided.   Eat the fleshy part of the leaf, scraping it off between your teeth.   Place the leaf on the side of your plate.   Remove the choke, the small leaves with sharp points, with your spoon and add to the eaten leaves.   Cut the heart into sections using a fork and knife, and dip with the fork into the sauc...

  With our world seemingly shrinking due to our travels to other countries, and even the influx of unfamiliar (to us) foods, we may be in a quandary of how to eat certain foods.   Even our familiar food items are a challenge at times.   Simple questions such as, “In a nice restaurant, do I eat a sandwich with my hands or knife and fork?” There are two answers to this question, so of course we could be confused.   Let’s make it easy, the bottom line is that there are common finger foods, such as the sandwich.    But, if you can use utensils , it is preferential.     We want to keep our hands as clean as possible.   Barbeque??   Well, that’s where we look the other way and hope for hand wipes on the table.   Common Finger Foods Artichoke               Asparagus             Bacon, if it is crisp San...