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Everyday Manners: Importance of Thank You Notes

Importance of thank you notes
The When & How of Expected Thank You Notes 

Electronic communication is a part of most everyone’s life these days but the handwritten thank-you note is as important now as it was in the past. It conveys much more than thanks. It conveys that you are a socially savvy, thankful person who recognizes those around you and that you value them--a powerful and positive message. And the great part about writing thank you notes is that it takes so little time to do something so constructive.

For a Gift?  Special Invite?

If the note is for a gift, always address the envelope to the names on the tag remembering to use titles, such as “Mrs.” You can use first names on the note. If the thank you is for a special dinner or invitation, you could use only the couple’s name on the envelope and mention children in the card. Additionally, please send all thank-you notes out as soon as possible. Some will tell you that you have a certain amount of time to write these for gifts received.  This isn’t the politest behavior and honestly doesn’t make sense.

Email?

May we write thank-you notes by email? Yes, but follow these with handwritten snail-mail thank-you notes.

When is a Handwritten Thank-You Note a Must?

  • For shower and wedding presents.
  • As an overnight—or longer—guest.
  • For presents not opened in the giver’s presence.
  • To the host for a party in your honor.
  • For gifts given at a party in your honor.
  • Gifts and flowers received after the death of a loved one—no time limit.
  • For an interview or opportunity to interview in the future.
  • Of acceptance or regret to formal invitation—more of a formal response.

Optional, but Still Most Polite

  • For gifts opened in the giver’s presence.
  • For a special favor.
  • For a note of congratulation in response to an important event, accomplishment, or honor.
  • For hosts after special dinner or party.

Thank You Note Examples

Business

Date

Dear Mr. XX:

Your current projects sound intriguing, especially considering my skill set and previous positions. I believe I could be a valued member of your team. Thank you for the opportunity to present my ideas.

I look forward to our next meeting.

Sincerely,

Ms. XX

Social

Date

Dear Aunt XX,

I love the chessboard you gave me for my birthday! Thank you so much. I have already beaten my dad twice. Maybe we can play a game the next time you come to visit.

See you soon,

Love, XX

Please Read

Anti-Clueless Etiquette: Tipping Guideline

Etiquette 101: How to write a Condolence Card or Letter

Holiday Etiquette Interview about Gifts, Parties, etc.


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